face(s) of tin-tin

When people look at my picture they would tell me that don’t change much. They would easily recognize who I am. I guess I still really look the same. Until now, I still look young. Or maybe since then I already look old. Here are my pictures through the years, you be the judge if my I still look the same. I won’t include my baby pictures.

I think I’m 7 years old here. And all I wanted for the Christmas are my two front teeth


My favorite picture. I don’t know why. My first holy communion. I was in grade two, and most probably it was held on October. So I guess I’m just 8 years old that time.


Another no eyes smile. Second year college. I’m 17 or 18.


Even if I have a short hair and wearing braces. Still the same.

And a picture taken just last July, so I’m 25 years old in this picture and after a month was told that I looked like I’m 30. Grrrr!!!


So what can you say? I still look the same, right? It’s just that every year, I just grow and grow. Hehehe. Yup, every year I would always hear: “You’re getting fatter.” Wait! Every year I would also hear them say: “You’re getting prettier.” hahahaha

I noticed something, my smile didn’t change also. Ever since it was already pacute :)

bday sentiments

reasons why i'm not excited for my bday:

1. i don't have any celebration
2. after 5 years, someone's out of my life
3. my phone is busted!

but then great things happened. my sister's bday gift to me is a new phone. yanyan, now i know you're not selfish. hehehe. still can't believe it. wahehehe. i received a phone call from somebody i'm not expecting anymore (please continue praying for me). and this phonecall gave me real hope again. i just hope this happy feeling would not end soon :)

Prison Break Realizations

i didn't notice the weekend passed coz i was just at home watching Prison Break. my new addiction. hehe. when we went to hear mass yesterday, we stopped the dvd at a very exciting part. so bitin talaga. that's why during the mass, i can't really concentrantrate on the mass mind's on the show. then a scene flashed to my mind. the other prisoners are getting mad at Michael Scofield because they're still not out of the prison and they're threatening him that he'll have a worst life if he won't be able to get them out of there coz he gave them hope. i was really irritated with them. on why they would get mad. they should be thankful coz scofield let them join in his secret. then i realized, i was like them. that's how i'm feeling now towards God. everything was going fine with me. hoping for somethings but not expecting. just hoping. then something happened. it's like a dream finally coming true. then zilch! it's gone. not yet really gone pero parang ganun. i'm like, "Lord, what's that then?" suddenly, i again try to listen to the priest's homily. and the first line i've heard.. "Don't lose hope." saya diba?

i'm not losing hope yet. and i guess the Lord is still trying to fix my schedule or is telling me to be patient. coz i really lack patience.

so why am i getting addicted with Prison Break? it has a nice story. suspense talaga. everytime i watch it, i feel like i'm going to die of heart attack. and the number one reason is because of the lead actor (Wentworth Miller). who's really hot! and his character (Michael Scofield) is also smart and kind-hearted. perfect!



a blogger who's as smart and as hot as Michael Scofield is celebrating his birthday this week. Happy birthday Renny! i hope you won't get mad coz i announced your birthday. and the description i made, well that's my gift to you. hahaha. happy birthday renny!

in one of my posts, renny asked me something. what do i want for my birthday? so, what do i want? secret! it's a surprise ;p

my crying session

Whenver I cry, I feel happy. Labo! it’s because I am crying. Labo talaga! Hahaha.

Before, when I was 5 years younger, I don’t cry. Well, I cry but really on very very rare occasions. Even if the people around me are crying their eyes out, I still don’t cry. It’s not that I don’t have any feelings or anything. I just don’t cry. i can feel the pain, I can feel the hurt, I can feel the sadness, I feel like crying but my tears won’t flow. I get teased, I get mad, I could burst crying but I don’t! It’s like something’s stuck in my tear ducts. I really prayed to God that I would learn how to cry. then recently, I learned how to cry. it’s like whatever it was blocking my tear ducts is now gone. Now I cry even if it’s mababaw. Just a cockroach in a cab, and I’ll cry. even if I’m in a public place I cry. in the movies I watch and books that I read, I cry. I don’t complain. Coz I prayed for it. And still I don’t cry that easily. I may feel down, but I won’t cry easily. It’s like I have a dam and I would not cry until it is filled up. So it could be that I don’t cry now even if it’s really worth crying, but later you tease me a little, I would cry. it’s because my dam is already filled up and tears would overflow. So if you see me cry, don’t mind me. just hand me a tissue and I’ll be okay a little later when the dam is empty again. And it also helps being absent from work. Hehehe.

grey's anatomy related

my sister bought a dvd of grey's anatomy, seasons 1 and 2. am watching now. just like her, i got addicted to it. hehe. there's this scene there that really struck me big time. it's about jorge and sona. jorge has a tumer in the middle part of his brain. if they remove it there's a big chance that half of his memory will be lost. but if they don't remove it, his chances of living will lessen. sona (the wife) chose surgery and meredith grey asked her why convincing her big time not to. the wife said that she's selfish. that even if jorge would lose memory of her, it would still be better than she losing him totally.

wala lang. i just totally agree with her. yup, i am also selfish. even if you forget about me, even if you won't care about me anymore, even if you'll have a new travel partner, even if you won't remember me, i don't care. as long as you're still alive and you are okay. then i'll be okay even if it'll hurt.

Short stories and a Tag

I was tageed again. but this time by Bananachoke. but before i start on the tag, i want to share some few things first...

- we ate in Outback,G4 last saturday. i know the staff there are great as i've experirenced before. but last saturday is different. our server, April, before handing us our bill was writing something on it. and i thought it was just nothing. but when i received the bill, there was something written on it: "It was a pleasure serving you both. - April" sweet diba?

- yesterday, i was in the Adoration Chapel, and i don't know tears just flowed and i was crying though i don't know why. yup! siraulo na ako. hahaha. anyway, while in the middle of my drama session, a lady tapped me and said: "Don't cry. Are you crying?" coz i was surprised, i said no. then she said "i thought you're crying" then left. after she left, i cried more. coz i asked God "Lord, even in the church, i'm not allowed to cry anymore?" but maybe the lady is God's angel. assuring me not to cry coz everything will be alright. wait! what's wrong ba? hehehe

that's all. now the tag. i just have to answer the questions...


HOW OFTEN DO YOU BLOG?
now, i blog on a weekly basis. before, i do it whenver an idea pops into mind or i just wanna share something. or if i just feel like it

ONLINE ALIAS:
puhlease; pretty tin

WHAT DO YOU DO MOST OFTEN WHEN YOU ARE BORED?
read and sleep. eat

WHEN BATHING, WHICH DO YOU WASH FIRST?
hands. i want to make sure my hands are clean before cleaning my body.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN AWAKE FOR 48 HOURS STRAIGHT?
slightly yes. for our baby class se37. i was in charge of the membership committe. so puyatan talaga for the directories and seatplan and other stuff.

WHAT COLOR LOOKS BEST ON YOU?
i guess black coz it makes me look smaller

WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?
ummm... basta it shouldn't taste alcohol.and not beer

DO YOU BELIEVE IN HEAVEN AND HELL AS A REAL PLACE THAT EACH OF US WILL GO TO AFTER DEATH?
yes. that's why i'm afraid to die. coz honestly i don't know if i'll go to heaven.

DO YOU FIND THAT YOU HAVE MORE ONLINE FRIENDS THAN OFFLINE FRIENDS?
No.

WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECTS IN SCHOOL?
for college, it's calculus (yup, unbelievable).

ARE YOU A PERFECTIONIST?
me?!?! no way!!

DO YOU SPEND MORE THAN YOU CAN AFFORD?
slightly

IS IT BETTER TO HAVE LOVED AND LOST THAT NEVER TO HAVE LOVED BEFORE?
of course! coz the experience and the feeling is incomparable

DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF CREATIVE?
unfortunately, nope

DO YOU GIVE YOURSELF THE CREDIT YOU DESERVE?
yes

DO YOU DONATE TIME OR MONEY TO CHARITIES?
Yep.

HAVE YOU RECENTLY DONE SOMETHING YOURSELF THAT YOU'VE BEEN CRITIZED OTHERS FOR DOING?
i'm sure i have. but can't think of any right now

WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND RIGHT NOW?
will i finish this before 1 pm

Say one nice thing about the person who tagged you and the five people that you are going to tag:

bananachoke is really funny and could be serious at the same time. and really mad with nestle. talagang kailangan ko imention yan. hehehe.

i won't be tagging anyone for this.sorry for being a killjoy. but if you want to answer this, it's okay. no problemo :)

Birthday Gift

I don’t know if you’ve noticed that I’m conceited or in tagalong, makapal ang mukha. I admit I am like that and since it’s my bday next I’ve decided to write my wishlist from you guys. what I’m gonna ask from you is somehow related with you, or what reminds me of you. Some of it could be out of this world and really expensive. But remember that this is all just for fun. If you’ll take it seriously, don’t get mad just give it to me na lang. Hahaha. I hope you’ll not be offended. Remember, this is just for fun.

Okay here goes…

Kuya Marvin and Ate Jopay – a 3G phone. So even if I don’t see you guys personally, I can still see you kahit sa phone lang. if you’ll give me one, kahit di niyo maremember bday ko, okay lang. you’re forgiven. hehehe

Duke - just a postcard. Because from all those I’ve mailed a greeting card that year, you’re the only one who replied the same way. You letter was very much appreciated. Thanks duke!

Ate Mylene – DVDs of the three best movies your company made. You’ll be the one to choose.

Kuya Beautiful – hairclip. Whenever I see your picture or name, I would always remember when I gave you the name kuya beautiful. Hehehe

Sir Tony – my own photo shoot. Hahaha

Julie – a ticket to Singapore coz I miss you and so I can see ice

Toe – a ticket to Cambodia. So I’ll be able to meet you and I’ll be able to visit the country I reported about during second year highschool. Hehe

Rey– jersey of any team

Alternati– a dollhouse. So I can show off how great of an architect you are

Mai– my digiscrap in frame. Vain talaga. Hahaha

Maan– photoshop tutorial

Therine– a computer that you yourself assembled

Toni-ann– scrapbook natin

Lei- a dinner treat. Kwentuhan lang tayo. It’s been a while since we last talked kasi

RalphT– treat in café breton for a week

Renny– Fårikål so I’ll be able to know if you can really cook. Heheh. Just kidding. And so I’ll be able to know how a lamb taste. Or better yet a round trip ticket to Norway so I’ll be able to experience in person its wonders

Neko– a round trip ticket to Hawaii

Vina– manila tour

Jase– perfume or flowers

Yuri– just your presence be felt again. What happened to you?? I miss you!

Jairam– your presence be felt also. Isa ka pang nawawala

Snglguy– a subscription to Time Magazine. Ikaw newsperson ko, diba? Since I don’t want to hold a newspaper (sorry, I don’t like it’s smell), time magazine na lang. hehe

Abaniko– a ticket to Davao. Even if you’re already staying here in manila, I still associate you with davao.

Cruise– mountain climbing

Iskoo/Piolo– camera

Sidney– black and white camera

Duke– sibik! O kahit hindi sibik basta kotse. Gamitin mo credit card mo ha

Mei– an angel figurine. Ito talaga naisip ko sayo.

Tani– a doctor toy set. Coz you’re a doctor. And I love those toys when I was a kid

Richard– dictionary. so I’ll be grammatically correct in my writings and also correct spelling

BW– Egyptian artifacts. Just make sure it’s not a mummy ha. And chicken inasal if you go home to bacolod

Jef– a painting made by you

Melai– cake. Ewan. Siguro kasi naalala ko nung maraming tira nung nagparty kayo dati. Alam ko kanin ata yung natira. Eh gusto ko cake. hehe

JV–DVD of Rent

Annalynn– roundtrip ticket to the US. So I can visit you guys. hehehe

Julie– doggie stuff toy

Bananas– nestle products. Joke!!!! :)

Lazarus– book on quotable quotes

Ann– shawarma. hehehe

Ghee– yakisoba. Coz everytime I visit your blog I see food. And this is the Japanese food that first came to my mind. Pero ayoko ng yakisoba. Except if it’s the instant noodles. Hehehe

Jon and Jeff– clothes from people are people. Wala lang, naremember ko lang ang F. hehehe

Manang– my own tarpaulin also. Nainggit. Hahaha

Jhed– a copy of your best dvd collection. Ayoko ng pirated ha

Bryan– a ticket to South Korea?

Neil– pringles!!!

Rex– Grey’s Anatomy DVD. Hehehe

Charles– food that you cooked

Ainah – pink bag. hehehe

Plong – blackberry. hehe

Emil – cellphone. Joke lang emil!

Neneng– dutch dictionary

Lalaine– load. Hehehe

Carey– one of your products. Ano ba business nyo?

Any violent reactions? For those I’ve failed to mention here, it doesn’t mean you’re not to give me a gift anymore. Hehehe. I’m sorry. I just can’t think of anything. But I have a question, if you’re really to give me a gift (it can be something impossible or not), what would you like to give me?

finally!!!

we already have electricity in our house! yehey! since thursday morning it's only today (wednesday) at 5am that we got to have electricity. and from friday night to monday ngiht, i didn't sleep in our house. and it made me remember my college days when i would just go home in my dorm to take a bath. hahaha.

though we already have electricity, we still do not have any phone line. so i'm in an internet shop now. and you know what? their blogger.com is like in chinese! bilib ako! i've already memorized this site coz i know what to click even if it is in chinese.

just want to leave a message coz i missed you guys!

discoveries

ace would always tell me before that i have this expression on my face when i get disappointed or on the brink of crying and stopping it. it's like my mouth is forming a sad face like those you draw. :( like that one. (sorry, i'm lazy today to research for a picture of a sad face.) anyway, i don't believe it. coz i know it's only for the cartoons. i know i can't tell a lie, but i thought i can hide my true feelings. not! the other day.. i was disappointed mom and i would cry any minute but i was really trying not to. but when i looked in the mirror and tried to smile. it's not my smiling face! now, i know what ace, ate france and the others say about that kind of face. it's really like my lips are facing down. even if i'm smiling, i'm still not smiling. haaay...

another discovery. i love to drink milk. but it was only last satuday that i discovered that a baby's milk tastes different and i don't like it!

last saturday, i attended Mark 10 (like the kids for Christ of Couples for Christ) and the drink that was served was milk. so while the kids are busy eating and after all my energy was drawn out (ang kukulit nilaÜ), i decided to drink milk. so i really filled up my cup. then right after i took a sip, tita joy asked me if it tasted good. she didn't need to hear my answer coz she saw on my face that i didn't like it. hehehe. then i asked her whet milk was that. it was lactum. the milk for babies. i thought it was nido or something like that. i thought the only milk that is not delicious are powdered non-fat milk. that's why i don't drink non-fat milk.

let's sing a song

got tagged again. this time by snglguy. i was to list the seven songs that is currently in my playlist. i'm in a sentimental mood right now. and i really want to listen to music that would really make me feel more depressed. i guess, i'm having my monthly visitor that's why. hehe. yup, i really have to announce it. hahaha. and i guess it also has to do with what happened to my friend Liebeth. kindly pray for her soul. so here are the songs...

1) Lately - "Lately, i've had the strangest feeling..."
i think this started my senti mode. after listening to the song, i feel like crying and would just listen to it again and again

2) Crave (by Marc Dorsey) - "It's you i crave, i crave your touch. i crave your lips.."
i saw a cd of my sister and it includes this song. i'm so happy! i love this song kse.

3) Somewhere Out There - "..beneath the pale moonlight"
i'm returning to my childhood. hahaha

4) A Whole New World (from the soundtrack of Aladdin) - "i can show you the world shining shimmering splendind..."
told you. i'm being childlike

5) Invisible Man (by 98 Degrees) - "Baby to you all i am, is the invisible man"
wala lang. gusto ko lang. hehe.

6) Warrior is a Child (by Gary Valenciano) - "Lately, i've been winning battles left and right"
feel ko talaga toh. it's like the song is describing me

7) Who Am I? (by Casting Crows) - "Who am I that the Lord of all the earth.."
a praise song that i like right now

sayang! the instructions are for 7 songs only. i really enjoyed this meme coz i was singing while typing the lyrics. hehehe.

Since this is called a tag, i'm gonna tag 7 people. I don't want to be the last one to be it. hehehe.
here goes the lucky persons are:

1. Tani - since you would like to be tagged, right? hehehe

2. Jhed - my bday gift for you

3. Renny - i don't know if you do tags, but i'm curious on the kind of music you're listening to

4. JV - aside from kapag tumibok ang puso, ano pa song mo? hahaha

5. Mai - so your mind would be off from digiscrapping for a while

6. Jase - i hope the list would not be purely madonna songs. hehe

7. Vina - what are your music on your new car?

Rainy Days and Mondays

Am supposed to be in the Singles’ Prayer Meeting in Makati now. But coz of the rain, my mom didn’t allow me telling me that I’ll have a hard time going home and that most areas now are flooded. So now, I’m at home. Wala lang. sharing lang. hehe.

I would really like to attend the prayer meeting coz I want to say thank You to Him. For He had been really good to me. I am really being blessed by Him. And it’s a blessing that I didn’t expect. Kaya ang galing lang talaga.

But recently, my other prayer to God is “Lord, lead me not into temptation.” When I tell this to my officemates, it’s like I’m just joking. But as they say, jokes are half meant. And I’m really thankful coz God is really not leading me into temptation. Well, circumstances are really funny now and somehow I’m enjoying it. But the good thing is still God would intervene so that I would not sin. Do you understand what I’m saying? If not, don’t worry. You’re not really meant to understand it. Hahaha.

Another sharing.. or an analysis. When I was with my former company, I had this crush. Well, we would smile at each other but that’s just it. I don’t think he knows my name. but when I was to leave the company, I discovered he knows my name. Syempre, sobrang kilig diba? But that’s just it. Coz I’ve already resigned. Then now, I have a crush here in the office for more than a year now. He knows my name coz we would be attending the same meetings. But now, we would talk even if it’s not office hours anymore. Kilig din lang. does that mean that I’m… just do the math. And I hope I’m having a correct analysis. Hahaha :)

I am sorry if this is full of nonsense. It’s Monday and it’s raining. And my background music now? Rainy days and Mondays… Okay, everybody sing ;p

death and a question

a batchmate of my brother (who is in third year highschool) died last weekend coz of dengue and pneumonia. my brother knows him coz they belonged in the same club (Boy Scout) when they were in grade7. i asked my brother to describe his batchmate. he said that he has a sunny disposition and would smile always. it's just sad how death can just happen and with the most unlikely people.

RalphT and Charles asked on their blog the one question you would like to ask them. i have a different question. my reply to ralph. what would be the one question that you would like to be asked? :)

usog

Usog

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

"Usog" is a Filipino superstition where an affliction or psychological disorder is attributed to an evil eye hex. It usually affects an unsuspecting child, usually an infant or toddler, who has been greeted by a stranger.

Once affected, the child begins to develop fever, and sometimes convulsions. Supposedly, the child can be cured by placing its clothing in hot water and boiling it. It is said that the condition is caused by the stranger having a masamang mata, or evil eye in Tagalog, lurking around. Superstitious folk have supposedly observed this phenomenon and regularly suggest this to the Psychiatric Disorders Handbook DSM-IV which, of course, is not accepted.

Usog can also affect adults, although it induces vomiting rather than fever. Supposedly, it can be prevented by stopping a stranger or visitor from greeting the child. Unlike "lihi", however, usog is not medically accepted.

both my pinkies are not straight. they are somewhat bended. and my mom said that if this is the case then you are prone to getting usog. maybe i am. and i remember one time in a jeepney, there was this cute baby with her grandmother. eventhough my friend and i both mentioned that the baby is cute, it was only i that the grandma asked to make a sign of the cross on the baby using my saliva. fyi, that's what they say is the cure for usog, a saliva of the person who gave usog. and that if you are prone to get usog, then you can easily give one too.

so, why am i talking about this? coz i had a really terrible headache last night with the matching feeling of wanting to throw up. and our household help said that maybe i was nausog.

...

last night is a turning point for me. it finally dawned on me that it's really totally over. i just hope you've realized it too...

Christmas Post

109 days to go before Christmas. tv shows have special christmas segments. everyone talks about it. and i hate it! everyone is excited about Christmas. it's not yet even december. they should be excited about my birthday muna. hahaha. in our home, setting-up of Christmas decors would be after my birthday. hehehe.

but honestly, unlike the previous years, i don't care much about the early excitement of people on Christmas. maybe it's because i don't have any plans for my bday. i'm not even excited for my bday. pathetic! it's pathetic for me coz i love celebrating my bday. i guess i'll just be excited about Christmas and maybe forget about my bday. but if i'm going to work for my bday, that's another story :)

"it's Christmas time all over the world tonight..."

so, Merry Christmas everyone! what's your Christmas wish and what are your plans for Christmas?

is it obvious that i have nothing to write? haaay...

singer in me

my singing voice is to die for. you would rather want to die than hear me sing. hehehe.

my father proposed something to me. he'll not enroll me to driving lessons but instead to a voice lesson so i can sing freely whenever i want. and he was amazed with the improvement of toni rose gayda (is it the correst surname?) so most probably, mine would improve also. i told him i don't like since if i'll have a great singing voice, i'll not be popular anymore. i'll just be one of those people who had a good singing voice.

yesterday, i heard mass with my highschool bestfriend. i told her that when i was still a kid i wanted to be a priest because the priest can sing anytime on microphone and nobody is stopping him. you know her suggestion? i can sing at the street corners like a crazy woman and nobody would stop me. i would even earn because i'm sure people would give me money. hahaha.

hmmm... change of careers?

In Saying Yes to the Lord

i posted months ago about always saying Yes to the Lord. i had said yes to the Lord again to serve in the St. Scho LSS last weekend and also as a worship leader for the BLD Singles Night last monday even if i think i am unworthy to do those. last saturday, i woke up very early coz i am really really nervous. but the weekend did just great. i had a very responsive lambs and they are all blessings. and last monday, i reported for work only in the afternoon but my officemates asked me if i'm okay coz i am unusually quiet. honestly i didn't notice that i was quiet. i was just really nervous. i even texted my BLD friends. and Praise God! the worship had been i guess a blessing to a lot of people. even if i had prepared a prayer earlier, when i started to pray infront, words just came out of my mind. it is really true that i should not worry coz the Holy Spirit will supply us with the words. the BLD Youth Ministry was totally amazing. at first, we thought it's the Youth prayer meeting coz there had been more Youth than the Singles. thank you Youth. love ko talaga kayo.

as i was really worried last monday, tita gene texted me that i would be blessed since i was continually using my God-given talents to serve Him. honestly, i'm not waiting for any blessings to come that's why i'm serving Him. i just wanted to be obedient to God. i told you, that's what i learned from the Youth Ministry, to be obedient to God. anyway, i was not expecting any blessing and most of all not so soon. then yesterday, somebody texted me asking me something. sobrang galing lang! coz i was totally not expecting it. everything is not sure but it's a start. and i'm just thankful for the opporunity/chance given to me even if it's not certain yet. just pray for me please that God will grant it to me if He wills it. actually, i'm hoping for Him to will it. but if not, i hope i can accept it and that i would be patient enough to wait for that something better that is in store for me :)

**i've added a daily prayer portion at my sidebar. it's the prayer i send out to my friends every morning. i hope it would be able to bless you as well.**

high IQ = liar

the other day, as i was channel surfing the show in the national geographic channel somehow caught my attention. it featured kids who were inside a room and was asked not to take a peek at the toys at their back. most of the kids looked and when asked afterwards if they did look, they all denied it.

based on this, an expert mentioned that those with high IQs tell lies to avoid punishment. then they showed Bill Clinton denying what happened to him and Lewinsky. hehe.

is that true? high IQ people don't tell lie? i don't tell a lie. so does that mean i have a low IQ? i beg to disagree! :)

birthday fever

i feel that my bday is already near. but i won't tell you when it is. hehehe. actually, it's still far. but i'm already thinking of what i'll do for my bday. am i going to have a party again? i want to but my budget says otherwise especially with the upcoming weddings of my cousins. so, for my friends, no celebration this year, okay? :)

last week, i saw my sis ainah to give her my bday gift. a golden bag.

nonsense post. hehe. i just want to ask, what's your plan for your bday? and what do you like to receive? don't give me world peace! and if you'd like to tell me, when is your bday also?

and happy birthday ainah!!! :)

unpretty

i see myself as beautiful. but when others (especially specific persons) keep on saying negative things about you, then somehow, you start to believe otherwise. it might be a joke or they're just teasing you, but if these same people keep on repeating it, and they never say anything positive to you. they never compliment you but just see faults, then i guess i can take only much. i can be patient, but my patience has its own limitations.

am i being too sensitive? maybe. but maybe the reason for this is because, just for once.. can i be appreciated by these same people?

preggy or not

i rode the MRT once again this afternoon on the way to ayala and on my way home. since i rode from quezon avenue station, i got the chance to sit. and also i do the round trip on the way home (meaning i rode in ayala going to taft then didn't leave the train). whenever i'm lucky to be seated (and not sleeping. hehe), i always look around if there is a pregnant woman. because if i see one, i would stand up and ask het to sit down. hello?? what if she'll give birth that instant coz of stress on standing. and she's carrying a heavy load, so make her comfortable. anyway, awhile ago i was debating with myself if the lady standing infront of me is pregnant or not. if she has a baby or she only has a big tummy. hehe. bad! but honestly, i am always troubled because the one standing could be pregnant. but i'm embarassed to let her sit and find out that she only has a big tummy. it would be an insult for her. *sigh* how will i know if there's really a baby inside?

forgiveness

how can you say that you've truly forgiven a person?

if you compare my relationship with my dad now and last year or two years ago, it's totally different. it's like i made a big change. i now talk to him more often. i can kid around him. i can make some requests from him. before, if i need something, i'll not ask from him. i would find another way to get it without getting any help from him.

last year in my sharing, i said that i'll forgive him. i have been sharing my life story thru Youth Life in the Spirit Seminars and Singles Encounter, but i guess it's only now that i can say i have forgiven him. but to be really honest, i don't know if i did. or i'm just putting everything behind. i hope i have forgiven him. and i just hope he would not abuse my forgiveness.

long overdue meme

And now, my second tag for the week. From the talented rey.

3 things that scare me:
1. cockroaches!!! – wait! They don’t scare me. I just hate them. (plastic! Hahaha)
2. an accident happening to my family
3. that I’ll not die in style. Hahaha.

3 people who can make me laugh:
1. joey de leon and michael v.
2. jack black (just saw nacho libre kse. Hehe)
3. cast of friends

3 things I love:
1. God
2. walking. It just really relaxes me
3. singing!

3 things I hate:
1. cockroaches!
2. hypocrites
3. feelers

3 things I don't understand:
1. life
2. economics. Hahaha. And to think I’m an econ major. Hahaha
3. for now, it’s God’s plan for me

3 things on my desk:
1. papers!!! Lots of papers and folders. Hehehe
2. desk displays that are gifts from my officemates
3. kalat! Parang malaking kalat ang table ko

3 things I'm doing right now:
1. doing this
2. listening to music
3. thinking of all work I have to do. hehe

3 things I wish to do before I die:
1. visit my friends who I have not seen for the longest time
2. do something that I have dreamed of
3. go to amanpulo. hahaha

3 things I can do:
1. smile and laugh
2. cook!
3. sing in style. hahaha

3 ways to describe my personality:
1. rules girl but at the same time a rebel
2. friendly and suplada at the same time (puro at the same time ha)
3. halo-halo. hahaha

3 things people might not know about me:
1. I don’t know how to lie. I’m not kidding. You’ll know when I lie, that’s why I always tell the truth
2. I took guitar lessons, in yamaha. But I didn’t learn how to play the guitar
3. I’m afraid of the dark. I can sleep with lights closed, but it should not be me who’s gonna close the lights. Or else, I’ll run to my bed with my eyes closed. hahaha

3 things I can't do:
1. tell a lie – see above for details. hehe
2. swim. I love the beach but I don’t know how to swim
3. be organized. Aargh!

3 things I think you should listen to:
1. God’s voice
2. praise/religious songs
3. my singing voice. hahaha

3 things I don't think you should listen to ever:
1. pessimists
2. backstabbers
3. temptations. hehehe

3 of my absolute favorite foods:
1. pizza!
2. tortang talong (what’s the english of this?)
3. chips

3 things I'd like to learn:
1. play the piano
2. ilocano
3. a foreign language

3 beverages I drink regularly(excluding water):
1. milk – I should drink milk in the morning. I don’t feel good in the morning until I drink milk
2. tang mango juice
3. coke sakto (I’m not really a coke drinker, but since it’s for free.. why would I say no to it? Hehehe)

3 shows I watched when I was a child:
1. Bioman
2. Nickelodeon show in channel 9. finders keepers every Wednesday, and double dare every friday
3. dog of flanders (I remember nobody played outside to watch the ending. And all of us cried)

just as my previous meme, I won’t be tagging anyone. But if you want to do this, feel free to do so.

But I have a challenge for you.. 3 things you want to tell me.

nonsense

it was fun while it lasted...

25 Going 30

do i look like i'm 30 years old? i won't dent my age when i'm 30. but i just can't accept that i look like i'm 30 now.

last weekend i was in occidental mindoro for work. and somone there thought i'm already 30 years old!?!?! i'm just 25, turning 26 in a few months time. i think i can accept if someone will tell me that i look like 27. but 30?!?!! i'm used to people telling me that i look a year or two less my age. that's why i'm really shocked when i was told that i look like 30. that's five years!!

it really made me think if i look old now. they told me it might be because of my body. (rey, wag nang kumontra) but still.. how bout my face? waaah!!! that happened last saturday, and until now i can't get over it :(

am i weird?

i'm back!!! after a very busy week, and i guess another week ahead, i got the chance to check out other people's blogs again and my email! hehehe. and what i've discovered? i've been tagged thrice! waah! i'll first do the tag that i received from snglguy and toe.

6 Weird Things About Me

1. sleeping with a pillow covering my face, or my hands if i don't have an extra pillow - i guess this is not weird anymore since snglguy does that also and so does others. but i thought it was somehow weird. coz when i was still really young, my dad would always tell my brother when i sleep: "Look at your Ate, she's covering her face again. she's ashamed of her face." honestly, i'm not. i'm just comfortable that way

2. everyday there's a blooper - promise!! as in everyday. before it would always be, i'll trip over or i'll get wounded. now, there's more. basta! bloopers everyday

3. i cry when i'm mad - i just cry. if ever i still talk to you and tell you not to talk to me, that means, i can still forgive you easily. but if i'm really totally pissed off at you, i just cry.

4. i find myself sexy - yup, that's weird! coz even if i know that i'm chubby, i still find myself sexy. nasa pagdadala. hahaha

5. i used to have lots of pimples - i included this because when i tell my friends who didn't know me when i was in highschool, they don't believe me. yes! i used to have really many pimples. my uncle would tell me that i don't have a face but a pimple. all i can say is thanks to the derma. hehe

6. i hate cockroaches! - there's nothing weird about it except that i don't want to see them. not even if they're just in tv, movies or pictures. and if for example i'm taking a bath and there's a cockroach, i'll really shout and really ask anybody in our house to kill it. i just hate them! especially the flipis (right, yuri?)

after writing this. i realized something.. i guess, i'm not weird at all :)

thank you

i have felt a little (little???) down last week, until the weekend. and i don't know why i posted my feelings here. maybe because i really need to be prayed for coz i'm losing hope. and honestly, i was amazed by the response i got. wow! i felt that you guys really care. and getting from first-time visitors wishes and prayers really touched my heart. and from my blogger-friends (yup, i already consider you as my friends), wow! thank you so much. the hugs, the prayers, the wishes, everything just made me smile and brightened my day. and jase, honestly, i felt your prayers. i really did. lakas nyong lahat kay God. hehehe. thank you so much.

is this awards night? hahaha. don't react. this is my moment. hahaha.

and i want to share to you my dear readers a challenge from a meme done by a very artistic architect, Artkitekto Rey. and look, the drawing really looks like me. even the mole. rey, bilib talaga ako sayo! you're really talented. and sweet for doing this. thank you so much..

...

i did not have a great week. i was in an angry mode and not at its finest. hahaha. and the weekend is not even great at all. i don't know. i just really feel bad. i feel like i've lost my self-respect and that i want to kill myself. for the first time in my life i contemplated on killing myself. i never entertained suicide coz i was afraid of hell. but now, i don't know. what happened? nothing really. i just feel so bad. i did not do anything really bad, it's just that i feel like everything is going downhill. everyday, i send morning prayers to my friends. those morning prayers are really applicable to me. but you know what? it's like i don't feel the power of prayer. sorry Papa God.

and what am i blabbing about? i don't know. haay... ang labo ko talaga. can i ask a favor? can you pray for me? thank you...

challenging meme

got this from snglguy. i found it challenging because if there's anyone who's gonna respond to this, it's gonna be a challenge to think of the answers. hehe. here's how it is...

If you comment on this post, I will…

1. respond with something random about you.

2. challenge you to try something.

3. pick a color that I associate with you.

4. tell you something I like about you.

5. tell you my first/clearest memory of you.

6. tell you what animal you remind me of.

7. ask you something I’ve always wanted to ask you.

8. pick a song that reminds me of you.

After I respond to the above mentioned 8 points in this blog, you will have to post the same meme, and my response, on your blog.

so, now i have to respond to snglguy's response.

Tin-tin> Oh, the food lover. Hehe, ok here goes…

Random: You impress me as someone who’s spiritual and yet at the same time, a rebel.

weird! coz i think that's the perfect description for me. friends who are really close to me and knows my story would know what i mean.

Challenge: I challenge you to try to be closer to your Dad.

hmmm... looks easy. hahaha. i'm trying to be close to him now. i just helped him the other day to fix our printer. hahaha

Color: Errr, Pink? You seem like a Pink loving kinda gurl…

actually, i just started loving pink recently. and you know what? for this week, pink is my color. my clothes should be pink or close to the shade of pink. hehe

Like: I like that you can be honest about yourself and it shows in your writings.

wow! thank you! :)

Memory: Uhhh, the best memory about you that I can think of? Err, that nice and uplifting comment you made in one of my post.

ummm... really? i did? what was my comment. sorry. i have a short term memory gap. hehe

Animal: A Pussycat. You can purr but at the same time have sharp claws.

i don't like cats pa naman. but i like your description. hahaha

Question: Who was the “inspiration” guy that you wrote in one of your entry?

wow! now i'm amazed with your memory. you still remember that? hehehe. he is an officemate that had been an inspiration. nothing more :)

Song: Hmmm, I think it would be Bette Midler’s “From a Distance”.

from a distance?? isn't this song about wars? hehehehe

there you go! any challengers? hehehe :)

drug test

last night, my brother gave my mom a note from school. the school is going to perform a drug-test to all its highschool students, just like what they did last year. my brother is in junior now, so that means, last year when he was srtill in 2nd year high, he had that kind of test. he confirmed that he had one last year. of course, there's no positive substance found in his body.

but i was just shocked to learn that they're performing this kind of test now to highschool students. i just encountered that when i was already applying for work. is drugs really that widely used that even kids use it? i'm just shocked to hear that kids of my brother's age use drugs, get someone pregnant, etc. maybe because i still see my brother as a little boy even if he's already 16 years old. could it be because i'm 10 years older than him?

blogging

i want to post something but i can't really think of a topic. so i just decided to post about the good things i get from blogging, particularly from reading blogs...

first, i get to be updated with the stories of my friends who i have not seen for a very long time like duke, carme and lanee. and those i don't see often like elaine and julie. and for those i see often, their blogs would always be the start of conversation, like ate jopay and kuya marvin?

i've also learned a lot of stuff. like jimmy choo, popularity of pinoy telenovelas in cambodia, the love united video, the comment whore, nice restaurants, that john the baptist is known as st. hans, great movie picks, mrs. world 2006 fiasco, blogssary, news on inq7 (hehehe), brandon routh in the christina aguilera mtv, and a blog template experiment (where i was not successful).

and i just love the personal stories of these fabulous and fantastic people: mai, duke, mai, neko, jhed, carey, melai, yuri, and jase!

sarap kumain!

can't think of an appropriate english title. hehe. i love to eat. so now you know why i'm chubby. i love exploring the restaurants of metro manila and elsewhere. i know my talent is in cooking that's why i love to try out food. and a good bonding moment with your friends is when you have coffee/lunch/dinner with them. here are some pictures of my eating escapades. hehe.




takaw talaga noh? :)

Freaky Tech and Savior

it's like technology hates me...

last night a friend sent his picture to my phone thru mms. i can't open it at first so i asked him to send it again. he sent it, but i managed to open it only after an hour. and when i opened it, it was my cousin!!!! i was surprised. told him about it, and resent the picture to him. he texted me saying that it is his picture. no way! the picture that i received was my cousin. and when i showed my family the picture, they all said the same thing, "it's julie!" (my cousin). my cousin is now living in the USA and as soon as i saw the picture, i said a prayer for her coz it really freaked me out.

then this morning, my friend Gwadz who is in the USA now called me up. she asked me if i receive her emails. i don't. and she doesn't receive my emails. it's just so weird. coz both of us had already sent emails before. and now that she's far, we don't receive it.

on a different topic. i've already seen superman returns! superman told lois lane that eveyone needs a savior. it made me think. who is my savior? then it occured to me, it's Jesus! and my guardian angel. the story.. my friend and i rode a cab on the way home. and because the driver is not friendly and i was not in the mood to be friendly also. i just told my friend to drop me off at quezon ave., and i'll just take another cab from there. there were no commuters in the place, and i was really afraid. so, i really prayed to Jesus and of course my guardian angel. i really believe in guardian angels. and i arrived home safe and sound :)

how about you? who is your savior?

Post-Honeymoon

after posting about honeymoon suggestions, now it's about babies!!!

i'm just happy for two of my close friends. they found out yesterday that the wife is pregnant. yipee!!! after 1 year of waiting. i don't know if they have thought of a name for their baby. basta ako, i already have names for my babies. excited! hahaha. if it's a boy, he's gonna be named Kyle Vincent. but i'm still thinking if about kyle, but the vincent will really be there. i just love saying the vincent. hehehe. and if it's a girl, she's Samantha. her nickname will be Sam.

what about you? what will you name your baby?

honeymoon

my cousin who's getting married this january texted me yesterday asking where will be a great honeymoon place but is not expensive. i replied maybe el nido, palawan. and my dream honeymoon is really amanpulo, so for me it's the perfect destination. hehehe. i just told him to pray that someone would give them a vacation in palawan as a gift. my dad suggested a newly-opened resort in panglao, bohol. my cousin didn't reply but i don't think he'll agree to that. it's bohol, it's where our dads are from. we practically grew up there (though we just go there every summer and Christmas breaks). it can't be boracay coz the girl is from roxas city and they are like going there every year.

out of the country? singapore? i don't think singapore nor hongkong is a honeymoon site.

well, it really kept me thinking of where would be a nice but affordable honeymoon place would be. (parang i'll get married soon ha. hehehe). any suggestion?

disappointing

i'm a very disorganized person. my stuff found anywhere. even my money is just kept anywhere in our house. really disorganized. hmm, now i wonder why they keep on asking me to organize a get-together. even my desk in the office is topsy-turvy. hahaha. no kidding. in tagalog, i'm burara.

the story.. i was handling an account before which was transferred to another division. i gave the documents to the other division, but my mistake was i did not have any transmittal letter or anything. i just gave the papers, and that was like last year. yesterday, they would be having a meeting regarding that account and they asked me for the document. i was like, i already transferred it to you. they cannot find it. we cannot trace it. they were asking me who i gave it to, but with my memory being like Dory of Finding Nemo, sorry. i really can't recall to who but i'm sure i have turned it over and it's not in my files anymore. until this morning, i was really worried. then finally! we found it. it's with them, and i nearly cried when i found it. relief! whew!

why was i worried? well, it's not really because i've lost something but because i hate to disappoint my two superiors (A. France and A. Elsie). i even texted them last night (at around 10pm) saying sorry for what happened. i hate disappointing people. i'm more worried of disappointing them than making them mad at me. these are two different things.

in my previous job, i was really doing my best not because i was afraid that my boss (either Sir JP or Ma'am Sally) will get mad at me but because i was afraid that i might disappoint them. these two people really believed in me, and i hate to make them think they're wrong about that. once, the VP of my present department reprimanded me and i really cried. reason? it's like i disappointed him, and the worst part is it was not my fault. in my present job, it's him i would not like to get disappointed. why? because as my two former supervisors believed in me, he also does. diba boss? hahaha. i somehow lack self-confidence and these three plus A. france and A. Elsie, helps me gain self-confidence. and i thank God for each of them.

why did i write this post? para makabawi kay A. France and A. Elsie coz i know A. France reads my blog once in a while. hehehe.

movie character

yesterday we've caught in star movies legally blonde2 starring reese witherspoon. and as the movie progresses, i told my sister if there's a movie characted that can desribe her most, it would be elle woods. just like elle woods, with the physical appearance people might think that she's a kikay party girl who's shallow, conceited, bitchy and just doesn't care about the world. but they're wrong. if you'll be fortunate to know her, you'll learn that she's full of depth. intelligent and smart. though bitchy at times, she can also be the most kind-hearted person in the world. i think even more kind-hearted than i am. and really care about the world and other people. and could definitely make a difference in the world.


me? my friends compared me to the characters of julia roberts and drew barrymore in their romantic flicks. a hopeless romantic who's full of bloopers in life. waiting for mr. right and believing he'll arrive in perfect time. (Mai, maybe i just heard the wrong calling before. hehe)

how about you? which movie character describes you the best?

walking away

i was totally pissed off yesterday afternoon. i don't want to get into details anymore. when i am irritated, pissed off, angry or whatever, i would like to get far away as much as possible. yesterday, i was thinking where i would go and eureka! CEBU! i'll go to cebu the very next day! why cebu? i don't know. i heard there's a promo so i called up PAL really excited. but sad to say, it would still cost me P4,000.00 so, frowning again, i hang up the phone. tried calling up cebu pacific but i cannot contact them.

so i texted my friends if they would like to go to puerto galera or corregidor with me the next day. but of course since it's an abrupt invite and it's not for free, nobody said yes :(

i just went home early from work and saw my mom who's going to hear mass. told her that i'll just go with her. after mass, i told my mom that i'll just walk home. i didn't go straight home but walked to the next nearest church. spent around 15minutes there and walked home. honestly, the walk and the church visit did me well. i am okasy now. i'm just at home not excited to leave anymore and spend much to release anger. hehehe. well, that's me just walking away...

My Dear Siblings

right now the wallpaper of my cellphone is a picture of me and my siblings. everyone who would see it would tell me that we do not look like each other. but when i tell them that i somehow looked like my brother, they would say, yeah you kinda look alike. well, it's because we both are like my dad and my sister really looks like my mom. and if you look at the three of us, you won't expect that we're siblings. especially me and my sister because we're totally different. if you don't know us, you wouldn't even think that we're two people who would hang out together. but even if we're all different, we love each other so much. naks! especially our baby(?) brother. and my brother really would take care of us her ates.

here's a picture of us three as seen in my phone. and guess who's older, me or my sister.

tin-tin,eric,yan-yan

Inlove?

no. i'm just inspired.

have i finally found him? honestly, i don't know. it may be or may be not him, but i just thank God (almost) everyday for the kilig moments that i have with him.

i just want to post something but can't think of anything to write about. i'm just happy now.

ummm.. to all the filipino readers, what's the english term for kilig?

Four Toe

got tagged by Toe. revenge time. hehe.

Four jobs I would really stink at:

1. Housekeeper - I am not an organized person. my things are always a mess.
2. Laundrywoman
3. Call center - i don't think i'll last in a job where i'll only be sitting down for eight hours
4. Pest control employee - it's not the cockroach who will leave the place but i will

Four pretend monikers I’ll never live up to:

1. Sexy - it was the name of our first dog
2. Diva - as if!
3. Miss Popular - i'm not popular. i'm just friendly
4. Miss Kikay - still can't believe it when others call me kikay or maarte. because my sister, mom and most friends would call me plain and simple

Four movies I will NEVER watch again, ever:

1. Tagalog lovestories - baduy na kung baduy! but tried to watch some of these films and promise it just made me sick. but in fairness, there are other tagalog films that are worth watching
2. Mission Impossible - i can't understand the story. but i like MI3
3. Joe's Apartment - puhlease! the stars of that film?!! yuck!
4. i forgot the title but it's also about roaches and i just slept during the entire film coz i don't want to open my eyes and watch

Four places that I would NEVER live in:

1. Alaska or the Antarctic and other freezing places - have to copy this.
2. Somalia
3. Ilocos or Cagayan - i'm sorry but i'm not really a north person
4. war zone countries

Four things I HATE to do on my weekends:

1. travel on a rainy day. sorry i just hate rain
2. arrange/clean my stuff
3. finish officework
4. visit a doctor for a check-up

Four TV shows I used to geek out to:

1. Bioman - Sorry Yuri. but i'm Pink5! hahaha. i have karate class at the same time. and my sister and i would pretend sick so we don't have to take classes and just watch bioman. hehehe
2. Perfect Strangers - we just used to laugh really hard with their jokes. hehe
3. Nickelodeon - particularly Finder's Keepers and Double Dare
4. Karate Kat - i forgot the title of the show. it's like a cartoon strip or something with Thundercats for Mondays (?), and Karate Kat on Wednesdays. and i also like their show on Fridays but i forgot the title

Four cigarette (or liquor) brands I’ve tried and enjoyed:

1. any cocktail drinks. hahaha

Four things I CAN live without:

1. Cigarettes - sorry but i hate the smell of lit cigarettes.
2. Cockroach!!! - should i say more
3. Beer - i get drunk easily when i drink beer. and i don't like it's taste
4. well, it's just really cockroaches

Four of my favorite cholesterol laden foods:

1. Pizza!! - it's just my weakness
2. Proven - it's a streetfood that i can only buy in LB. it's like hotshots of kfc
3. Sisig
4. Chocolates

Four places I would rather be in right NOW (if I had the money that is):

1. Bora bora or Amanpulo
2. California - to visit my college barkada
3. Cambodia - my sister and i are pestering my dad to treat us a trip to Cambodia
4. Anywhere as long as i'm with ... - sorry can't say his name coz some of the readers know him. hehe.

i had fun answering it but also had a hard time writing stuff that i don't like. hehe. sorry, but i'll tag Neko. so you'll have something to post :)

Subic Virgin's Dream Coming True on a Special Father's Day

the title really described my weekend. it was my frist time to go to Subic. pathetic and unbelievable, i know. and i really had a blast. as my mom said, after a long time our family went out of town once again (we don't count cebu and bohol trips). and by family i mean the five of us complete (father, mother, brother, sister..how do you brush your teeth. hehe). it had been a memorable weekend also. why?

1. first time in subic. should i say more?

2. i jammed with the resort's band. and really sang my heart out. it was a dream come true. for those who haven't heard me sing. well, just be thankful that you haven't heard me yet. as they say, it's all about the guts and stage presence and not the voice. hahaha. trust me!

3. i made lambing to my dad. this is the biggest deal i guess. here's the story. since it's my first time to go to Subic, i wanted to go to the Zoobic Safari. since it's late already and somehow expensive if my dad would be the only one to pay for all 5 of us, my mom said that we shouldn't go. as we were in the Butterfly Garden, i went to my dad, rubbed his big belly and said: "Pa, Zoobic Safari." afterwards, my sister asked where will we go next. without missing a beat, my dad answered: "Zoobic Safari. khet kayong tatlo lang." (Zoobic Safari, even it'll only be the three of you) meaning us children. they were all shocked and i was like, ha! my dad misses me!

this is a big deal, because as much as possible i stay away from my dad. but four years ago, i am a Papa's Girl. something happened, i don't talk to him until last year. but still i don't touch him. during mass, i don't kiss him but bless. because i don't want to really touch him. that's why it's really a big deal. after four years, ngayon lang ulit ako naglambing.

i really had fun last weekend with my family. wait! if my memory serves me right, my sister and mom didn't have a fight last weekend. and everyone was just laughing and really having a good time. well, except for my brother who kinda got drunk. hehe. love you eric!

also, i would like to commend the staff of White Rock Resort, they are really accommodating and courteous. they really made everyone's stay enjoyable and at home.

i am sure the Father's Day this year had been extra meaningful to my dad and the whole family. even if he spent a lot. he didn't care coz i'm sure for the first time again, he felt how it is to be my dad again.

pretty tin = nun???

my friend and i were having a fun time taking pictures in the last Singles Encounter in Los Baños last weekend. i told her to take my picture infront of the altar ala first holy communion. seeing me posing a friend suddenly remarked: "it's a prophecy of you being a nun!" i was like WHAT?!?!? no way! she was like, you really are going to be a nun. the day after, we had a ministering with the candidates. as they say, usually the ones you minister would usually be of the same nature of problem or experience with you. and one of the candidates i minister said that she has a calling to be a nun. i asked if she wants to be one. she told me that we are from God and that's all she can repay Him. i was like.. okay...

short background. i was invited two months ago in a search-in, to determine my calling.. if i'm for married life, single-blessedness or religious life. i was worried the whole time because i am afraid that maybe i am not for married life. we were asked to pray out loud individually. and my prayer as something like telling God to help me readily accept what He wants for me.

and after the weekend, i am really worried. what if i'm for religious life? waaah! can i take it? will i last long there? honestly, when we toured the convent, i know i can;t last there. it was so quiet. i can't pray long. and honestly, the first thing i noticed are their clothes. even if they can wear just shirt and jeans, it's like i can't take their clothing. waaah!!! and am i really fit to be a nun?

*thanks to jopay for taking the picture :)

Dreams

"Everyone believes that the main aim in life is to follow a plan. They never ask if that plan is theirs or created by another. They accumulate experiences, memories, things than they could possibly cope with. That’s why they forget their dreams." -- Paulo Coelho, The Zahir

from the same author as The Alchemist, wherein i got the line "When a person really desires something, all the universe conspires to help that person to realize his dream." which had been the inspiration for my very first entry in this blog. and i felt that the line is not true in my life. but when i read the line from The Zahir, it said everything i feel.

i'm not the type of person who has everything planned out in her life. i'm the as anything goes type of person. but as everyone else here, i had dreams when i was a child. so, i studied, etc., etc.. but then circumstances happen. i accumulated experiences, and then i'm here now. far from my dream(s). it's like i'm following another plan. honestly, i have forgotten about my dream. and i just recalled about it only a month ago.

i'm not in a senti mode right now. it just made me assessed my life. but still i did not assess it, coz i am afreaid. i may not get favorable results.

Rustans Makati

bought a new pair of sandals yesterday in Rustans Makati. and as i was to pay my sandals, i asked first if they still accept Gentxt for discounts. the cashier for U was just new since they rotate every month, and she has no idea because it Gentxt is only available for U costumers. a very nice saleslady (Eds), said that she thinks that the promo can still be availed and really looked for and called up a former U cashier at another floor. as i was saying my thanks, Eds told me: "sayang din po kse yung discount." which is absolutely true. and now that i need cash, the discount really helps. i was really amazed at how wonderful these people are. the service that they give their customers. bow ako.

while the fuss was going on, i texted my sister bout the incident. and she texted back: "that why i do my impulsive buying in rustans. not only good quality but also good service." i just told my sister: "from now on, i'll do my impulsive buying here na din." duh! as if i'm really an impulsive buyer. hehehe.

but really. now, when i do my shopping, i'll first check rustans before going to other stores.

Yes Lord!

yesterday before the mass began, a clergy approached my mom and asked if our family could be the offerors for that mass. my mom said no. i told her, say yes! don't say no. good thing the clergy was not far yet and my mom changed her answer. so, for the first time (i guess) our family (complete, that is, including my dad) offered during the mass yesterday.

after mass, i told my mom that one thing i learned from BLD Youth (as also seconded by my brother) is obedience to God. that if God asked you to serve Him (of course through other people), just say Yes. even if it is somewhat impossible, say Yes because God will make a way.

obedience to God is not easy. i've been guilty of not following Him at times. i was not punished but i guess maybe it would be better if i just followed Him before.

pretty tin

as i was bloghopping, i encountered a post where the girl asked if she really is ugly. saying that only her parents and relatives said that she is beautiful. and it's not counted since they have no choice and as the saying goes: 'a face only a mother can love' i commented that at least her parents told her she was beautiful.

my parents are weird. i think they're the only parents who would say that their child is ugly. when i was in college, a highschool friend invited me to go to Boracay. we were there for four days. since it's our first time to be there, we really tanned ourselves. no make it burned ourselves in the sun. when i returned to manila, and my saw me, she commented: "ang pangit mo" (you're ugly). that's why after that, when i go to the beach, i don't really enjoy the sun because i became conscious not to havr some tan or else my mom would tell me that am ugly again. two months ago, my mom saw my 6th grade crush with his girlfriend. my mom told my sister about it and when my sister asked who's prettier, i am or the girl, my mom answered the girl. when my sister told her she's bad, my mom defended herself by saying that it's because the girl is more mestiza than i am. and when my dad saw my ex with a new girl in robinson's place last month and my sister again asked the question of who's prettier, my dad replied that it's also the girl. and when my sister once again confronted him about it, he tried to defend himself by saying that it's because i am bigger than the girl. i've confronted my dad, and he uses the same defense. i told him he was asked who is prettier not sexier. a girl can be big but still pretty. we're talking about the face and not the body.

see! i told you i have weird parents. and even if my face is not loved by mom (coz i unfortunately look like my dad), i am still happy with my face. no joke! i still consider myself as pretty. and i know i am blessed. because even with a (pretty? hehe) face like this, i know that a lot of people still loves me.

old stuff

as i was searching thru my things for old photos of the BLD Youth for gwadz's despedida, i saw a lot of stuff that are both old and memorable. i saw the letters i received from my friends for the SE and also letters way back from college (those from highschool are kept in the different area of our house. hehe). grad pics from gradeschool to college friends. duke! even your debut invitation was there. hehe. and what i can't believe is i still have my ronald mcdonald's fun fun fun club id. hehehe. the card that made me eat cheeseburger when i was a kid eventhough i like to order fried chicken, just to get a free gift. hahaha.

i didn't find what i'm looking for. but i saw how blessed i am with friends and how blessed my life is :)

simple pleasures in life..

been tagged by Duke and this cheered me up nga. thanks duke! :)

It’s a great thing to be able to count your blessings, even the simplest ones.
Instructions: Name ten (10) of life’s simple pleasures that you like the most, then pick ten (10) people to do the same. Try to be original and creative and not to use things that someone else has already used.

1. being in the Adoration Chapel - just staying there gives me a feeling of peacefulness. if i don't feel good, i just go there.
2. walking - as i have previously mentioned in my posts before. i love to walk. it gives me time to think and realize things.
3. reading books - i love to read.
4. receiving sms from friends - even if it's a forwarded message
5. eating crepes - i don't know but since last year this had been my favorite and my weakness!
6. going to a new place/trying our new restaurants
7. singing!
8. when my crush texts/calls or just even smiles at me :)
9. watching the sunset
10. reading comments in my blog. hahaha

i'll only tag 7. and the lucky ones are (drumrolls please. hehe):
iyna and plong - coz i miss you guys
toe - belated happy bday and new home!
duke - ang nagpapamiss
mei - belated bday girl
elaine - so, you'll also feel good

The Word

"Lord, I am not worthy to receive You, but only say the Word and I shall be healed."

after reciting these words at yesterday's mass, i asked: "Lord, what is the Word? have You told me and i just didn't hear it? have i missed it? what is the Word, Lord?"

just a question...

appreciated

i wasn't feeling good the whole day today. not really in the mood to work. didn;t finish my lunch. and was somewhat quiet in the office. then after office, a sis in lb called me up to see if i am okay coz they are worried for i don't answer their text messages, calls and even emails.

then later on, i've texted selected friends from the soc that i am really thankful for them, that i saw how blessed i am with their friendship. that even if i don;t make my presence felt (just for a month), they still give a damn about me. then most of them gave the same reply. sent almost the same message. finally, i've made my presence felt. that they are worried about me already. that they miss me. and whatever is happening, they are just there.

of course i cried. that moment i've felt loved. i realized that there are still someone who worries about me, who misses me. in other words, who appreciates me.

as i've told iyna in my comment.. not talking to you guys is like punishing myself. actually, it really is a punishment. then why in the first place why did i do it? i don't know. i just didn't realize that my silence would mean a thing to you. love you guys. thank you :)

super trendy

most of my officemates call me super. it's not because i have super powers but i usually use the word super in my sentences. for example: super traffic, super wait lang.

then yesterday morning, i heard in a radio commercial that the word "super" is popular now that you should use it in every sentence/phrase. just like what i usually do. when i heard that, i don't want to use the word super anymore.

i have this trait that when something i like becomes a fad, i'm not keen about it anymore. i liked badminton. that was my favorite sport. i even have a racket. but when it became popular in our country, i don't want to play it anymore. sorry Kuya Marvin and Abaniko.

call me mayabang. i don't care. hehe. i guess i would just now use totally. ;p

template disaster

waaah! i decided to change my template to give my blog a new look. what i didn't know is that when i change the template, all my links will be erased. even the tagboard. even if the message of joey was deleted, i am not happy. it's like i am going to do everything from scratch. i am trying to recall all the links that i have. so guys, if ever you're not included in the list at the side, just inform me okay?

Iloilo River

just came back from iloilo. and for the three nights that we were there, our ilonggo officemates always brought us to restaurants with the iloilo river in the background. it was like the pasig river of manila. but only a cleaner version. unlike here in manila, they put into good use the river. they placed restaurants, bars, hotels beside it, to have it as part of the ambience. thus, a need to maintain the cleanliness of the river. i just feel sad for the fate of the condition of the pasig river now. especially after hearing from the old ones how beautiful the river was before.

*photo from http://www.skyscrapercity.com/

Why?

why is it I always push away those who really care about me. first, it was ace, now econsoc.

why do i not push away those who really don't give a damn about me?

why do i always reach for those who are far from me? and why would i not just appreciate those around me?

Grrrrr!

last night, i noticed that there's a new message in my tagboard and it really made my blood boiled. i shouldn't be affected, but i am. here's the message:

joey: Im really worried because every time i see your picture, i dont see it pretty or beautifull.One thing is sure, you're healhty in plain language you're mataba.

before that, there's a message from the same person (i presume)..

joey: Why are you so fat?ay mali healthy pala.You're not pretty naman but you keep on calling yourself pretty.

to joey, whoever you are. and i think i know you personally. thanks for worrying about me. i'm touched. but no need to worry about me because i don't really worry about it. i'm trying to enjoy my life, okay? and you're not even my boyfriend. and don't tell me that you won't have a gf as fat/healthy as me, because i won't have a bf also who's not a gentleman. and don't tell me, i would never have a bf with my size. well, to tell you the truth, having a bf is the least of my priorities. you may hear me always saying that i want to have a bf, believe me. i'm just saying that to silence you guys out. i have more important priorities in my life now that i want to accomplish than having a boyfriend.

and for the record, i don't call myself pretty because i see myself as the prettiest girl, but i call myself pretty because i want to. if i want to be called a princess, i can easily do that.

with this entry, i wanna apologize to sam and gani who i texted and emailed regarding this. sorry if i somehow assumed that it's you guys. because you're the only ones who always use different names in my tagboard. promise! i believe now that you're not joey. sorry...

Father's Day Special naman (hehe)

last night, while i was walking home from church i passed by a father teaching her daughter how to drive. it brought back memories when i was 17 and my dad taught me how to drive. we would go up to the mountains of binangonan so there'll be no cars. that's why i perfected driving sa mga hanging. and remembered the time when we nearly drove off a cliff. hehe. as in my dad was really panicky. and the first time i drove in edsa, my dad always telling me to slow down. (sorry, i'm used to race cars in arcades. hehe).

now, my sister nags my papa to enroll her to driving schools. while with me, he was the one who volunteered to teach me and even got me my student's license.

aaah... the closeness i had with my father.. is all part of the past now.. just like my knowledge in driving...

Mother's Day Special

i realized just recently how blessed i am with my mom. how much she loves her children and a really understanding mom. she has been through a lot these past years. and everything happening to her continuously. though my sister and i had done things she would not be proud of, she still accepts us. she did not disown us despite of all these. though we have not shown respect to her, she still loved us her children. promise! kawawa ang nanay namin sa amin. but this made me look up to her. how many moms would you find who will try to understand their children? don't tell me all the moms would do that coz that's hypocrisy. i don't think they'll be able to stand everything that has happened to my mom. and i'm grateful that after 20 years, i finally appreciated my mom and seen her worth. love you ma!

Manila, Manila

was talking to my friend from the province who had never been to Manila. i told him, that if ever he'll visit Manila, i'll show him to places. then it occurred to me, where will i bring him. though i've been living in Manila, all my life. i don't know where to take him. honestly, what came to my mind was Ayala Center. because that's where i usuall am and it has everything, from malls to a museum. but i don't think i can consider it a tourist spot. actually, when i told him about showing the places of Manila, i was actually thinking of Baguio, , Tagaytay, Corregidor. hahaha. (fyi, these places are not in Manila, they are in nearby provinces). it's just later on that i realized, Manila also has some Filipino tourist spots on its own. Rizal Park, Intramuros, Museong Pambata, Quiapo, Divisoria, Araneta Center, and UP Diliman, to name a few.

wow! besides of beautiful faces (ahem!), manila can boast a lot of sites that is still unique and has a rich history.

Missing Myself

last night, i've got to talk to my ex again. my ex told me: "sobrang miss na miss kita. namimiss ko yung tin-tin dati (i really miss you. i miss the tin-tin before)." then i cried. it's not because i miss my ex, but it's because i also miss myself. yup, i really miss myself. i don't know what's happening to me. i am in a silent mode right now. i don't make my presence felt by my friends. i don't know, i just want to be alone for a while.

a lot has been asking about me. where am i, what's happening to me? honestly, i also wanna know. i feel so lost. quarter-life crisis? i don't know. i am just more prayerful now, so i'll not lose hope and would not just give up on life itself.

DVD Marathon

for the holy week, my family just stayed at home and had a DVD marathon. and in most of the movies we've watched, made me realize some things.

If Only


the story is about a couple and the guy is not really sweet to his girlfriend and not really vocal with the way he feels. then one day, his gf died and the next day, his gf was alive again. as if everything was just a nightmare.

it made me realize that even if my ex would have a new gf and would forget about me, it will be okay, as long as my ex won't die.

Rent


"Live in my house, I'll be your shelter. Just pay me back with 1,000 kisses... I think they meant it when they said you can't buy love. Now I know you can rent it, a new lease you are my love."

when i heard the song, i said to myself: "Hey! that's the song of ace for me before." hehehe. something we can't also buy is our life. our lives are just lent out to us by God. and we can show our appreciation to Him by taking care of our lives.

The Godfather Trilogy


i think it was a Godfather week for a lot of people. my family watched it, and i was surprised to learn that a number of my sister's friends watched it also for the weekend.

"Don't hate your enemies, it will cloud your judgment" - Godfather II

so true! that is why when i am pissed off with someone, i just go for a walk, or go to the Blessed Sacrament. especially if it's work-related. coz i don't want my work to be tainted by my anger.

and the favorite of my sister and her friends.. "This is the price you pay for the life you choose" - Al Pacino, Godfather III

i believe every action we do, there is a price we have to pay. every decision we make has its own consequences. and for the life i'm living now? i did not choose this. coz if i would have a choice, this would not be my choice. but i believe that the life i'm living now is the result of all the decisions i made in life. big or small.

Life-Verse

"The LORD called me from birth, from my mother’s womb he gave me my name. For now the LORD has spoken who formed me as his servant from the womb" - Isiah 49: 1,5

A verse from the first reading today. Also the introduction of my life-sharing. It really describes my life. And when i read it when i was searching for a verse to describe the beginning of my life.. this really struck me. I've realized that the reason i was born is really to serve God. I'm gonna share the first part of my life-sharing.

"I felt I was someone who was not supposed to be born but God had great plans for me. I was conceived before my parents married, with my own father even doubting at first, that I was his child. Mama told me that she would not have me aborted even if Papa did not marry her. She would rather give me away than have me aborted. It was a difficult pregnancy, and my mom nearly lost me many times. I was born a month earlier than scheduled and I was christened Kristine Marie, from Christ and Mary to whom my mom prayed to when she was pregnant."

well, as i said, i'll just share the first part. So, that's it. if you want to hear the rest, join the Singles Encounter on April 28-30. ayun! sabay plugging. hahaha ;p